About 'It Was Me'

The feature film 'A Better Man' follows conversations between co-director Attiya Khan and the man who abused her throughout their two-year relationship as teenagers 25 years ago. A free online stream of the film is available at tvo.org.

The interactive companion piece, It Was Me (abettermanfilm.com/interactive), features the anonymous voices of six men who have used violence against an intimate partner, and are now working to change their behaviour and find ways to take responsibility for the harm they caused. Several of these men have participated in the voluntary men’s program at Changing Ways.

Changing Ways’ support is palpable in the ways these men describe their abusive behaviour – with honesty, remorse and self-awareness. They are honest not only about the progress they have made so far in their journeys to nonviolence and accountability, but also about legs of the journey they have yet to traverse. Indeed, these Changing Ways participants have helped light a path forward for others who may be in their shoes.

Lives can be changed by services like Changing Ways. As the impact producer for A Better Man, a multimedia documentary project that explores what it means to take responsibility for gender-based violence, I believe groups like Changing Ways are playing a vital role in building violence-free communities.
— Steph Guthrie - Impact Producer of 'A Better Man' and Co-Director of 'It Was Me' (December 12, 2017)

About 'A Better Man'

A Better Man offers a fresh and nuanced look at the healing and revelation that can happen for everyone involved when men take responsibility for their abuse.

It also empowers audience members to play new roles in challenging domestic violence, whether it’s in their own relationships or as part of a broader movement for social change.

A Better Man documents a personal experiment for me and my abusive ex-partner — a step towards understanding and accountability. By getting closer to the truth of what survivors experience, and of why men choose to use violence, we can help stop the abuse. I hope that sharing my personal search for justice and healing will contribute to the struggle to end domestic violence.”

– Attiya Khan, Co-Director